"My Nutrition Levels Have Disappeared."

Just re-read some of my old posts and I can't believe I haven't discussed the food I've eaten at length. What the hell.

In addition to all the jumping off of and out of things that NZ has been, this has also been a really delicious epicurean trip.

First of all, the meat (beef, lamb, pork, chicken, goat, ostrich, lama, venison...and kangaroo for Australia's sake) is legitimately free range and hormone free, because when your entire country only has like 25 people (give or take 4 million) living in it, you don't need to produce the ridiculous quantities that places like the USA does.
So, meat just tastes better because in my head, the animals are living happier lives.
With accents.

The fruit and vegetable selection isn't so different from home, except some things are cheaper because they're local, such as avocado, mango, kiwi, and apples. The apples here vary like crazy but for the most part, the Sundowners and Cox's Orange Pippin are my favorites. (If you were unaware, I have a thing for apples.)

There's a lot of trans-Asian cuisine so lamb/chicken/beef satay is big. I like that.
Also, sushi is big. And cheap. Because the fish is caught 20 feet away sometimes. And the sushi comes in these long rolls that are more reminiscent of an open-ended egg roll than the circle things I've had back in the States. I like that, too.

And, for the most part, the breads are just excellent. Not the sandwich shit you have to buy at the cheapo Pak N' Save because you can't afford the other cheap shit at the more elite supermarkets, but the breads you buy at bakeries, of which there are many. Bakeries are everywhere, and people use them. Daily-baked fresh bread is as easy to find here as unclear-as-to-when-this-was-actually-made-Chinese-food is in delis in NYC.

The sandwiches are typically ham-based. Ham and cheese and tomato, ham and cheese and pineapple, ham and cheese and cheese and ham. They also use a lot of avocados and chicken and tomato, which I think is a great idea. Eggs and ham and cheese and tomato, also common.

The meat pie is a big thing here, an obvious leftover from the Brits and the Irish and the like. I have to be honest, meat pie makes me dry heave. I've tried all kinds of combinations---steak and mushroom, mince meat, potato and meat, cheese and meat, whathaveyou---and they're all too salty and generally just too much for me. But if you're poor (I am) and you need sustenance (I do) and you have $3.50 most of the time (I hope), then meat pies are a pretty frequent meal.

The pizza here is generally a travesty, and any sort of "red sauce" dish is just unacceptable.
I miss Villa Maria's.

The side dishes are usually pretty potato-based; fries are called chips and chips are called crisps. They're all pretty good. Wedges are by far the favorite child of all potato sides. But let the record show that Fuel and Fuddle still holds the no. 1 spot for most incredible sweet potato fries.

Also---the sauces are worth mentioning. The sweet chili sauce is incredible. Ketchup, or "tomato sauce," is not. There's no mustard to speak of, which, in my opinion, is disgusting.

As for desserts, they know what the hell they're doing.

The ice cream is creamier---by which I mean, low fat and sugar free and diet-friendly ice cream is much harder to find. Which is good, because ice cream is not diet-friendly. If you're dieting, don't eat ice cream. That's a diet.

But they make this real fruit ice cream that has quickly become my favorite way to spend $5.00: it's either plain vanilla or plain chocolate ice cream with frozen fresh fruit---blueberries, strawberries, raspberries, boysenberries, blackberries, peaches, mangos, etc---blended in. Incredible. And if you want, you can mix them all in at once. Don't though, it's only going to let you down.

Moving on to other desserts, I should mention the Pavlova. I thought this was an Australian thing since Justin made it, but apparently it's originally a Kiwi delicacy. Basically it's just egg whites and sugar and cream and fruit, and I can't explain it in any other terms besides: diabetic.

I've saved the best for last, by which I mean: Vanilla Slice.

Slices are the general southern hemispherical term for what we northerners might call bars or brownies, and they're all Really Fucking Good. The Vanilla Slice, however, is in a league of it's own. It looks really plain and sort of boring, but it's not. It's not, whatsoever. On the bottom, it's got a sort of pie crust/pastry dough/cookie consistency that's really buttery and almost salty and flakey enough but not too flakey. Then it's got this vanilla pudding kind of thing but it's a bit firmer, almost a mix of pudding and batter. Then there's another layer of the pie crust/phyllo dough, then another layer of pudding. And then, it's topped with this incredible vanilla frosting that almost defies description: it's firm but gooey, sort of like carrot cake frosting mixed with whipped cream. Or something. If anyone knows where this can be procured in the USA, please let me know. It's the one reason I sometimes look at the real estate postings in the information centers in little out of the way towns we stop at to use the public toilets.

Unrelated to food, I recently went Zorbing (Google it) and caving and saw glow worms and taught our 19 year-old tour guides the correct chorus to "Juicy" by Biggie Smalls.
I also got to eat a traditional Maori dinner (which was pretty much picnic foods...?) and learned a little about their culture, which, like the aboriginal people of Australia, has been wiped out and then restored poorly, by white people. Go white people, go.

Unrelated to any of that, I also just got into a fight with a douchey gap year-aged Welsh kid named Paul who, after I told him I was from the USA, asked me if I knew where Wales was with a very smug look on his face, and when I said, "yeah, do you know where the States are?" told me, "Yeah, it's that country with all those [n-words], right?" Way to go, Welsh kid.

Your Heritage is Peace

I'm in Kaikoura again after 4 glorious days in Queenstown.
I do not hesitate or exaggerate when I say Queenstown is the coolest place I have ever and might ever see in real life.

It was everything everyone said it would be plus a really pretty rose garden no one told me about.
I spent the first night catching up on some relaxation and much needed re-packing of my bag. EXCITING.
The days were spent wandering around the city and various gardens and coastal walking tracks.
And it's a good thing I was so "active" because Queenstown is famous for one of the best foods ever created: the Fergburger.
The Fergburger almost defies description. Which is why I'm glad they have a website: http://www.fergburger.com/fullscreen.html
It's almost like a Fathead's sammich, except that Fathead's has a larger array to choose from and part of the Ferg-appeal is the size, which is massive.
Clearly, if I'm spending time recounting the experience here, it was deadly.

My last day was spent cruising through Milford Sound, which was a gorgeous way to see such a place.
My pictures will be up soon so you can all agree about how gorgeous it is.

My last night was spent visiting many of the 300 bars and clubs the city has to offer, and I learned the secret to getting free shots of gin from bartenders.
Part of the secret is knowing who Sid the Kid is.
There are more parts of the secret but like I said, I got free shots of gin, so they will remain a secret. To me, especially.

Needless to say, I got to experience both the natural beauty and night life Queenstown has on offer, and it rules.

Unrelatedly, I saw this sign in front of the Kaikoura Memorial Centre that said, "Your heritage is peace" (translated from a Maori saying) and it made me stop and think.
Very rarely do I think of my heritage in a way that doesn't involve civil unrest or war or immigration [due to war] or something along those lines. Not because my family is super contentious, but because the history I've been taught always focused on who was in charge of whom and when.
I guess there is a difference between history and heritage semantically speaking, but if you're taught to be proud of being peaceful, maybe your history wouldn't be so full of facts about wars?

And The Sweet Assity Continues

Hello, my adoring public.

So many things have happened since I started my New Zealand trip, I had to look through my pictures to remember everything...

I started in Christchurch, which was terrific. I really enjoyed that city and the people I met there were great. I also found the kosher bagel place.

Then I went to Kaikoura and started my Stray bus trip, which lets me jump on and off wherever/whenever I want to. Kaikoura was GORGEOUS, sort of similar to Byron Bay in Australia but much, much smaller and with much, much fewer batshit insane people. Although, I did run into Camilla (the crazy ass receptionist ho from Byron who ruined my time there) and I pretended not to see her. At first I stared to make sure it was her, then decided it was her, then feigned a fascination with the community notice board advertising bait and tackle.

Then from Kaikoura I went to Picton and headed down to Abel Tasman to hike a gorgeous and lengthy 28 km coastal walk. It took about 7 hours and it was absolutely beautiful.
I also met a group of Washington Staters who were great (my second group of Washington Staters thus far---they're such a nice breed!) and we went to the one bar in Abel Tasman and partook of the open mic night they had going on.
I don't know how to explain what I saw/heard/generally experienced unless I used the words heady, vegan, and patchouli and also wookie.
There was a marionette performance and a woman who sang Czech songs and a band that covered the theme song to "Fresh Prince of Bel Air" for about 25 minutes and also a song that goes, "I don't like cricket---I LOVE IT."

Then onto Punakaiki to see some pancake rocks, which was cool but not that cool, and then we went to Barrytown. Barrytown, like many of the towns along the west coast of the south island, used to be a big town with a lot of gold rushers but since the rush has died down, so has the population growth. In fact, Barrytown is now home to a whopping 42 people. So, we had a nice dinner and drank a lot of BazVegas homebrew beer and dressed up in ridiculous costumes and had a party. Theme: I Can't Believe You Came To My Party Dressed Like That. I wore a leotard and spandex pants and old-school Adidas sneakers and called myself Jane Fonda. People went with it. I taught people how to do the Running Man (Banin, you would have been PROUD). It was an absolute BALL.

Then we went to Franz Joseph Glacier where we were going to go on a full day glacier hike, but it was rained out and got canceled. I was really disappointed, since I was about to walk on a glacier, but we still had a nice time watching the USA lose to Canada in hockey. I represented the USA very well and reminded everyone I saw without being asked which country in North America was also called Just America. We drank that night away and had a general great time.

Then we drove to Makarora which was ehh. But! Early that morning, I JUMPED OUT OF A PLANE. I decided to do it a while ago and spoke to an Alaskan who told me that Fox Glacier was the most beautiful place to jump, so I went on his advice and he was right. Let the record show that he might be the only Alaskan worth listening to (THAT'S A PALIN DIG, DAD. READ IT AND WEEP). The jump was a lot more peaceful than I expected it to be, and I got to see the earth in a way I've never experienced before. New Zealand is a goddamn beautiful place, and after having jumped out of a plane and seeing it so personally, I feel so fortunate that I was able to come out here and experience the nature it has to offer. I jumped through a cloud into a circular rainbow which my Brazilian guide explained in broken English "happens not much often" and that was amazing. I also got to see Fox Glacier, Mount Cook and Mount Tasman, so technically, I saw a glacier up close and personal. Makarora was a bit of a let down after all that. It's a pretty place but felt kind of stupid to stay there when we could've gone straight through to Queenstown or Wanaka in an hour's time. We had a karaoke night and I sang a lot of Neil Diamond. Basically it was good.

Then I decided to take a day off from the crazy and spent a night in Wanaka which was BEAUTIFUL. It has so far been my absolute favorite part of the trip (scenery-wise) because it's just breathtaking. The pictures I took don't do it justice but trust me when I say it made me want to recycle so our future generations might have the chance to see such a place.

And today I JUMPED OFF OF A BRIDGE. I can't explain how incredible it was to just free fall off of a perfectly stable structure into nothingness and then water, but I'll try. Imagine learning that you have wings and that you can only use them for the next 30 minutes. Obviously, you're going to want to use those wings, especially because you know you won't be able to use them later (wings = balls, or guts) so you have a choice: fly or be lame. So, I flew and it was BRILLIANT. Very easily the most incredible experience I've ever had. The adrenaline rush was great and my video and pictures are pretty hilarious. I screamed a lot of obscenities and the watching public had to cover their children's ears. I spent the first half of the jump just screaming "FFFFUUUUUCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKK" and then once I hit the water and came back up I [apparently though I don't recall doing so] ordered everyone to "SHUT THE FUCK UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP!" and when one of the staffers asked one of the others if I was ok, they replied with, "Yeah, I think she's just from New Jersey." And they all said, "oh."

Now I'm in Queenstown. It's beautiful and cool and though I've never been to Colorado, probably it's like some parts there? I really like being so close to the mountains and the terrain here is like nothing I've ever actually seen in the real. I've learned that I much prefer a good walk through the woods to a day at the beach (maybe a walk through the woods to the beach?) and am seriously considering becoming very rich so as to afford a vacation home somewhere here. It's just that incredible. I sort of regret spending so much time in Australia and not spending 2 months there and 2 months here, but, c'est la vie. Live and learn. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to. Just gives me a reason to come back and do what I haven't had time for or couldn't afford. Could be worse.

Sending love from all the way across the world!

NEW ZEALAND!

I'm on a glacier, it's March already, everything looks surreal and this country has officially become The Most Beautiful Country I've Ever Seen.

More when I'm not so busy doing SWEET ASS SHIT.

New Zealand? More Like Best Zealand

Hiya from Christchurch, quite possibly the youngest, drunkest city in the whole world!
Possibly not, too.
Regardless, IT'S GREAT.

The layout of the city is not so different from Adelaide in South Australia; everything is very close to everything else because it's pretty small but also, pretty absolutely gorgeous.
There are squares and parks everywhere and the botanical gardens are just beautiful.
And I don't even like flowers!

There's a city tram that runs through the center of town (there's a place called Cathedral Square which more or less is the center of town) and on a day like today (Saturday in February), it's almost a shame to use such a convenience.
The weather isn't much cooler than it was in Sydney but it is virtually dry, as in, not humid, and that makes everything that much more tolerable/prefered by those with curly hair.

So far, I've spent my time in New Zealand strolling through the gardens and street fairs and listening to so many street musicians.

Oh and meeting absolutely hilarious characters:

-Iraqi man who told me he was Chinese ("You believe me almost! Because my body is very small! I kid with you!!!!!!") and who had a travel journal of all the friends he's made while living here, and took a picture of me and told me he would call that page "Girl from the United States of New York," and I did not correct him.

-very hairy, skinny guy from San Jose/Santa Barbara who was here on vacation after working for 6 months in Antarctica "doing science." I asked him if he knew where my hostel was and he said he was on his way there but first NEEDED to get a Big Mac, so I accompanied him with a new friend I had made on the plane from Lincolnshire-near-London and we took his picture as he bit into his first Big Mac since 2007.

-then while we were in the Mackers (that's what McDonald's is called in the Southern Hemisphere), two extremely drunk and friendly older gentlemen approached us to ask if we could show them where the line to order was.
Punchline: they were already in line.

Finally, I made it to my hostel and promptly fell asleep.

Of course, this was all after a VERY eventful airport experience.

I was randomly selected to be late for my flight. They made me open every compartment of everything I own, and then they asked me to produce receipts from when I purchased my pear and banana. When I said I didn't get a receipt since it only cost me $1.20, they asked me a minimum of 5 times why I was leaving Australia and if I spoke and undersood English.

But, all in all, I have nothing but good things to say about my experience.

Some travel updates:

As it turns out, I will be here (in NZ) until March 22nd.
(As it also turns out, you can't just go places. You need to have a visa or a ticket of departure. The customer services representatives all over the airport will be happy to reiterate this information ad nauseum.)

Then I fly back to Sydney and fly back out of Sydney on March 24th, to Hong Kong, then from Hong Kong to Istanbul, then from Istanbul to Tel Aviv, where I end my flight on March 25th at 9:40am.
Plans are to be in the motherland, working on a kibbutz and reliving the summer of '07 until about June something.

And then!
And then!

ITALIA!!!

Maybe.

Looks like I'll be meeting up with Meg and Mere (and MiLF and LRN in spirit) sometime in mid to late June and then Bridey in the wee days of July.
How exciting!

I'm really looking forward to this leg of the journey, not just because New Zealand is Middle Earth, but also because I've been traveling for about 3 months now and it's just occurred to me how much me-time that's been. I really love my own company, but it can get a bit much when you're the only one laughing at your jokes and also the only one making jokes at all. Tom's been working in Sydney while I've been galavanting around, and though I've met some great people and had a lot of fun, you (I) forget how necessary it is to have a real friend around sometimes. It's been nice to go back to Sydney and recharge my batteries and reconnect with Tom and the barefoot shower and trustworthy beds, but the fact is that 3 months of traveling by yourself can get very lonely. I had a little breakdown when some of my plans got screwed up so I saw "Up in the Air" and that made everything worse before it got better. The good news is, my breakdown is over and I'm back on the horse, so to speak. I'm excited to be here. I'm excited to see some of the most beautiful things anyone has ever seen. I'm also excited to have a change of pace from Australia; I really love that country but it's also put me through the proverbial wringer and I think it's time to break it off between us.

In sum: I'm in New Zealand! How great is that! SO GREAT.